Think lube is only for menopausal women struggling with vaginal dryness? It's time we clear up this outdated assumption and start realising just how many benefits lube has regardless of your age, relationship status, or gender.

Here, we'll look at why lube can improve your sex life, how to choose the best lube, and how to use it.

What Is Lube?

Lube, or lubricant, is a fluid formulated to be used during foreplay, intercourse, or masturbation to reduce friction, increase glide, and enhance pleasure.

When Should You Use Lube?

Lube can be especially beneficial when used:

  • With dental dams

  • With condoms (Always double check to be sure the lube is compatible with condoms)

  • During anal sex or anal play

  • During foreplay

  • During masturbation

  • With female (internal) condoms

How Do You Apply Lube?

After warming up the lube between your fingers, apply it directly to the area you are stimulating or the sex toy you are using it with. And don't be afraid to have a little fun with it. Have you ever had your partner place a drop of lube between their fingers before stimulating your nipples?


How Much Lube Should I Use?

The amount of lube you choose to use depends entirely on your preferences. A little tends to go a long way.

In general, try starting with two to three drops of lube and add more as necessary.

Important Considerations When Using Lube

  • Reapply lube as often as needed

  • Make sure your lube is compatible with your sex toy (silicone-based lubricants can damage silicone toys, so water-based is best in these cases)

  • When it comes to anal play, more is usually better

  • Make sure your lube will not damage the condom you are using (oil-based lubricants can make condoms porous and weak, leaving them prone to splitting)

  • Do a patch test to make sure you are not allergic to any of the lubricant's ingredents

  • Remember that lubricants do not prevent STD's or pregnancy

What Affects Lubrication Levels In Women?

Natural vaginal lubrication can be affected by various factors such as:

  • Relationship issues

  • High levels of anxiety or stress

  • Hormonal changes as a result of menstruation, menopause, breastfeeding, or pregnancy

  • Certain medications (i.e. allergy meds, contraceptives, or anti-depressants

  • Immune disorders

  • Having a full hysterectomy

  • Diabetes

  • Chemotherapy

  • Lack of foreplay

  • Chemical products such as feminine sprays, douches, harsh soaps, or perfumed toilet paper

Can I Use Saliva As Lube?

While saliva can be used as lube if it is all you have, it is not ideal as it dries out quickly and does not provide much slip.

What Are the Different Types of Lubricants?

There are several types of lube to choose from depending on where you plan to use it and what type of activity you plan to use it for (i.e. anal play, vaginal penetration, use with a sex toy, foreplay, etc.).

Each type of lube has different benefits and factors to take into consideration. Here is a comparison between water-based, oil-based, silicone-based, and petroleum-based lubes.

Water-Based Lubricants

Water-based lubricants are a popular, versatile option and generally safe for most sexual activities.

Water-based lubes are:

  • Inexpensive

  • Safe for use with most silicone sex toys

  • Safe for use with diaphragms and latex condoms

  • Non-staining

  • Safe (check packaging to be sure) if ingested in small amounts during sex

  • Closest to natural lubrication (or at least they feel that way)

  • Great for nourishing the vagina (especially a high-quality, organic lube) as it gets absorbed into the tissues of the vagina to help it feel more flexible

  • Easy to wash off

  • Easily reactivated with a little water

Oil-Based Lubricants

With a creamier texture, oil-based lubricants are excellent for:

  • Long-lasting slip and glide with less need for reapplication

  • Masturbation

  • Using as a massage oil


Keep in mind that oil-based lubricants are not condom compatible.

Silicone Lubricants

Silicone-based lubricants are long-lasting, safe with latex condoms (always double-check the product instructions to be sure), and good for use in water. However, they are not compatible with silicone sex toys.

Petroleum-Based Lubricants

Simply put, petroleum-based products do not make great lubricants as they:

  • Are difficult to wash off

  • May irritate the vagina

  • May increase susceptibility to yeast infections

  • Can damage latex products and condoms

Is There A Difference Between Anal and Vaginal Lube?

Whether you are the giver or receiver, anal play should never feel painful or uncomfortable. Since the anus does not produce its own lubrication, lubricant is a key part of making the act of anal play enjoyable, safe, and comfortable.

While any lube is likely better than none, it is ideal to choose a product specially created for anal play.


Vaginal lubricants are formulated to match the specific ph of the vagina, which is slightly more acidic than the anus. A good anal lube will be a better match for the ph of the anal region and be free of any potential irritants.

Should I Use An Organic Lube?

Considering lube gets applied to some of the body's most fragile, sensitive areas, I recommend choosing a lube that is:

  • Free of hidden synthetic chemicals

  • Free of mucosal irritants

  • Packed with beneficial, natural, plant-based ingredients

Have More Questions on Lube?

If you are still curious which lube would work best for you or aren't sure how to incorporate it into your sex life, please feel free to reach out to me. I also invite you to join my private Facebook group - a sacred space where no question is off-limits and you can comfortably talk about all your sex questions, body questions, and self-love questions

If you are still curious which lube would work best for you or aren't sure how to incorporate it into your sex life, please feel free to reach out to me. I also invite you to join my private Facebook group - a sacred space where no question is off-limits and you can comfortably talk about all your sex questions, body questions, and self-love questions. 

November 03, 2020 — Rosie Rees

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