The honeymoon myth and keeping the spark alive
As a long-term relationship progresses, it’s common to feel the initial spark has fizzled out. You may start to question whether you’re just not as compatible as you thought. Maybe the honeymoon phase wasn’t a myth after all?
The truth is that the honeymoon phase is just that - a phase. It typically lasts three to six months before things start to become more “serious” and seemingly less exciting. The initial spark is not meant to last forever, and when it fades, it doesn’t mean your relationship is doomed. Instead, it’s up to you and your partner to find ways to keep the spark alive and maintain the connection you once had.
Another relationship myth is the 7-year itch, where partners start to feel bored and disconnected. This stems from research uncovering a theme of cheating and/or breakups around the 7-year milestone.
Here are some suggestions to help reignite and maintain the passion, playfulness, and intimacy in your long-term relationship:
1. Communicate Openly & Honestly
Communication is key to any successful relationship, especially those that stand the test of time. It’s important to remember that your partner can’t read your mind, so regularly check in and share your thoughts, feelings, and desires. Be open to listening to your partner and their needs as well.
2. Keep Things Fresh & Exciting
It’s easy to fall into a routine in a long-term relationship, but it’s important to keep things fresh and exciting. Try new things together; hobbies, restaurants, vacation spots. Why not go for a cheeky drive and get frisky on the side of the road or in a secluded area?
When you move out of your comfort zone and experience new things together, it naturally brings excitement and novelty to the relationship.
3. Prioritise Quality Time
Make time for each other in the monotony of everyday life. Set aside time each week for a date night or a weekend getaway. It doesn’t have to be extravagant; going for a walk, having a movie night, or cooking together. Remember, quality time is all about being present and engaged with each other. Conversely, give yourself an opportunity to miss each other with time apart. This can break up the routine and create space to bring light back to your relationship but must be agreed on by both partners.
4. Physical Intimacy
This is an essential part of any relationship, especially in a long-term one. Make time for physical intimacy, whether cuddling, kissing, having sex, trying new things or exploring each other’s bodies. Physical touch outside of sexual intimacy, like holding hands or hugging, can help maintain the connection between you and your partner. Try incorporating open-mouth kissing on the daily!
5. Show Appreciation & Gratitude
In a long-term relationship, you can fall into the trap of taking each other for granted. It’s important to show appreciation and gratitude regularly. Expressing your love and appreciation through words, gestures, and gifts can help keep the spark alive. Don’t forget to acknowledge and celebrate the things that make your partner special and unique.
The honeymoon phase may have ended, but that doesn’t mean your relationship has to. By working to maintain your connection and reignite the passion and intimacy between you and your partner, you can continue to build a fulfilling and loving relationship for years to come.